Scurvy Jake's Pirate Blog » Random Thoughts

Staying In Touch

Scurvy Jake — Wed, 20 Jul 2011 23:42:45 +0000

We live in a wonderful age. It amazes me how accessible things are today. If I want to read a book, I can buy it and read it on my Kindle in under a minute or two. If I have a question, the Internet has an answer. Well, it has several answers, and most of them are junk, but you get my meaning.

This year is my 20th high school reunion. I moved to Idaho for the last year and a half of high school, but was invited to attend a reunion in Hood River OR, where I originally went to school. Nobody in Idaho ever contacted me about a 20th here, and I wouldn't go if they did, but that's beside the point. So I set about trying to find some of the few friends I had back then with whom I haven't been in contact in the last two decades.

I was successful, and better than I had hoped, but it lead me to think about how connected we are today, and how much easier it is to stay in touch with people than it ever has been before. With social networks like Facebook, Twitter, and the new Google Plus you can't hardly stay away from people unless you never join in the first place.

Twenty years ago, I might send a letter if I had your address, or call on your birthday if I had your number and remembered your birthday. Today with email and text, tweets, wall-posting, or stream-sharing such a contact takes moments, and can be done whilst waiting in the checkout line at the grocery store.

These truly are amazing times in which we live.

Mess With the Blank

Scurvy Jake — Fri, 15 Oct 2010 05:48:54 +0000

Let's have a thinking exercise. Take the phrase mess with the bull, you get the horns and make a new one in the same spirit.

For example, I'll start a couple:

Mess with the cat, you get the fuzzy ears. (not so good)

Mess with the moose, you get the antlers. (better)

Mess with the angler fish, you get the lantern thingy. (awesome)

Now you try!

If I Owned a Gas Station

Scurvy Jake — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 19:05:07 +0000

I would put short hoses at the pumps to punish the people that pull up on the wrong side just to get a quicker spot.

Oversubscribed

Scurvy Jake — Thu, 24 Jun 2010 20:47:26 +0000

I'm feeling a little oversubscribed. Between Twitter, RSS feeds of my favorite sites, and (sigh) Facebook, I typically get at least two copies of every bit of information, and frequently all three.

What I need now is a good duplicate-detecting social site aggregator.

A Nice Day Outside

Scurvy Jake — Sat, 05 Jun 2010 17:05:17 +0000

Means I'll have a nicer day inside while it's still Spring…

Stupid allergies.

New T-Shirt Idea

Scurvy Jake — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 20:03:04 +0000

I would pay money for a Porkins is my wingman t-shirt. Someone should make one so I can buy it.

It’s Been Quiet

Scurvy Jake — Wed, 17 Feb 2010 20:37:30 +0000

I haven't had much to say here, and like my mom always told me, "If you don't have anything snarky to say, don't say anything at all." At least that's what I think she said.

Well, maybe that's what I heard.

Anyway, work is as busy as usual, not enough hours in the day, blah blah.

What I Really Want

Scurvy Jake — Fri, 12 Feb 2010 17:24:49 +0000

My wife asked what I wanted for Valentine's Day. I said I didn't want anything, no big deal. What I didn't say was what I really wanted: robot pants and a velociraptor with head-mounted lasers to do my bidding.

To be fair, they'd be pretty expensive.

Baby Pigeons?

Scurvy Jake — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 17:46:10 +0000

Everyone that's seen a pigeon raise your hand.

Now, everyone that's never seen a baby pigeon lower your hand.

Notice how few hands are left up? Why is this, you ask? Lacking better scientific evidence, let me explain it by asking two more questions:

Have you ever seen a fat pigeon? Yes? Okay, ever see one so fat it couldn't fly? No?? Of course not!

Pigeons are like amoebas in that they reproduce asexually. You see, when a pigeon reaches a certain size after gorging itself on fattening tourist fare, it splits into two smaller, hungrier pigeons. This is why you see so many at heavily-trafficked tourist destinations like Piazza San Marco in Venice. It also explains that, while you may see a few corpulent pigeons, you'll never see one so morbidly obese that it cannot fly.

Lost and Found

Scurvy Jake — Tue, 29 Dec 2009 21:37:40 +0000

I lost a filling over Christmas. I found out that I need a crown to replace it. Fortunately, no root canal was necessary. My excellent dentist took care of it right when I called. He did a great job of making sure I was numb before drilling, too.

Holy cow I just had to blow my nose with half my face numb. FAIL!