Posted in Reviews
First watch, 4 bells (10:25 pm)

I just finished watching Bloodlust, another season 6 episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000. This movie had a lot less science fiction and a lot more crazy than normal. There was a great short film at the beginning about Uncle Jim's Dairy Farm though, which nearly redeemed the movie!

The movie is about two young couples on a boat that get off on an island that turns out to be a crazy hunter's personal playground. He captures them, and they find out he hunts people for trophies.

That was basically all there was to it, and I can only give it four empty seats, one for each of the young "stars" of this film.

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The Creeping Terror
Posted in Reviews
First dog watch, 1 bell (4:35 pm)

Next on the list: The Creeping Terror. I'm pretty sure I've seen this movie before, but I didn't review it, so I had to subject myself to it a second time.

This movie starts with a newlywed couple returning home to California when a rocket lands nearby. The sheriff and his deputies check it out, and the government is called in quickly. They find a monster on board that is imprisoned, and later learn there is another one on the loose. The other monster rampages across the countryside, albeit somewhat slowly, and eats people whole. For some reason, they're never able to run from it.

As entertaining as that may sound, it really wasn't. This movie was somewhat slow, and every once in a while a narrator would come along and narrate a conversation that is going on on-screen. I give this movie one hundred empty seats, which is at least how many people were eaten by this stupid monster.

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Colossus and the Headhunters
Posted in Reviews
Afternoon watch, 8 bells (4:26 pm)

After a long hiatus, I've gone back to watching more MST3K (I'm on season 6). This time it's Colossus and the Headhunters, a terrible Italian movie about a guy named Maciste (we can only assume he's Colossus, but they never really tell us). Since they pronounce it like "my cheese steak" there are quite a few jokes about that throughout the show. Maciste is on an island as a volcano is erupting and people are running for their lives. Although he's a stranger, they follow him to a boat (his boat?) where they leave just as the island sinks into the sea. They sail to another island where a war is raging between two tribes, one of them headhunters. The headhunters are ruled by a guy that left the other tribe, and he captured the old king so he could force the king's daughter to marry him so he could be king.

Full of lots of Italians in short shorts, this movie wasn't really my thing. But because of all the near cheek-shots, I rate this movie two empty seats one for each of the eyes that was put out of the old king. If only I had been so lucky, I wouldn't have seen this horrible movie…

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