Attack of the The Eye Creatures
Posted in Reviews
First watch, 2 bells (9:05 pm)

No, it's not a typo: Attack of the the Eye Creatures was titled on screen with two the's. This was certainly a very bad scifi movie. You could see the zipper on the alien eye creature costume. They didn't have a big enough budget for the creature suits, so some of the creatures had black clothes and sneakers on with just alien head and hands. The night scenes kept switching between day and night, it was really distracting.

When two teenagers accidentally hit a creature while driving with their lights off, they try to tell the police that there's an alien running around. Meanwhile, the military was already tracking the UFO (when it's goofball radar guys weren't using the technology to spy on teen make-out sessions, anyway), and when they try to open up the saucer it self-destructs. The rest of the aliens are killed by bright lights.

I give this movie dozens of empty seats for the poor continuity and the fact that "they just didn't care."

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Crash of Moons
Posted in Reviews
First dog watch, 1 bell (4:47 pm)

I just finished Crash of Moons, the "long-awaited" sequel to Manhunt in Space. Full of more "space" things, (like a space anchor, this movie wasn't very good. It certainly had a lot of take-off and landing scenes where little model rockets spat out sparks from their engines. This one also had space lighting when two moons came closer and closer together. And there was a lot of smoky clouds in space around the moons, too. Apparently this is another one of those scifi movies that was stitched together from an even older TV show, which I guess explains some of the broken-up feeling of the movie. Anyway, I give this movie one class first-name seat, for Hollingsworth Morse, the Director of both films.

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The Beatniks
Posted in Reviews
First dog watch, 1 bell (4:46 pm)

I've really got some catching up to do. Yesterday I watched The Beatniks, another 1960's teen idol singing movie about a "beatnik" that makes it good when his singing talent is discovered. The problem is he just can't seem to leave his old life and friends behind. This movie stank, and I'll probably never watch it again because of how bad it sucked, not to mention how utterly boring it was. If it wasn't for Joel and the 'bots, I'd have never made it through. I give this movie all empty seats, because nobody should have to watch it.

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Happy Birthday, Lorien!
Posted in Warm and Fuzzy
Forenoon watch, 6 bells (11:25 am)

Today is my wife's birthday. I have to backdate this post because I forgot to post it 🙁 I'll be better about it next time, I swear!

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Tormented
Posted in Reviews
Morning watch, 7 bells (7:52 am)

I watched Tormented the other day, but neglected to write my review right away, so here goes.

Tormented is a black and white Bert I. Gordon movie about a jazz musician that is getting married to a girl on an island, but is visited by an old girlfriend. While talking to her, she falls off the top of the lighthouse, and he withholds his help that would have saved her life because she threatened to reveal his past to the "new girl" or something along those lines. I'm not sure which island they're supposed to be on, but it seemed like it was off the East coast of the US. Anyway, the old girlfriend starts to haunt the jazz musician, but nobody else sees or hears her. The haunting drives him crazy enough that eventually he dies as well, at which point the movie ends. Sure there's a lot more plot to it, and this is probably the darkest MST3K show so far, but that's enough to get the point across.

I give this movie one haunted empty seat for being so dark.

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